Tag: Grange Activities

Let’s Have a Party!

By Walter Boomsma, Guest Columnist

“…look upon children… If we desire to encourage them to love rural life, we must make its labors cheerful. What a child sees makes the most lasting impression. We may tell them of the pleasures and independence of the farmer’s life; but if their daily intercourse with us shows it to be tedious, irksome, laborious, without any recreation of body or mind, they will soon lose all interest in it and seek enjoyment elsewhere.”

(The Overseer’s Instruction during the Fourth Degree.)

I, along with many others, believe that adults are obsolete children. Many of my colleagues in education like to wax eloquent about the differences between how kids learn (pedagogy) and how adults learn (andragogy). I’m more interested in the similarities. How different are we, really?

During a recent conversation with another Granger, we caught ourselves engaged in what might be called a “Pity Party.” You’ve probably attended a few yourself. A pity party is an occasion of feeling self-indulgently sorry for yourself. It can be done alone or with others. One of the earliest uses of the expression was in 1978 when singer Barbara Mandrell sang about having a pity party after her lover left her. But I digress.

Fortunately, my Grange friend and I recognized what we were doing. Parties often have themes. The theme of our pity party was the sad condition of our order in general—dwindling membership, lack of leadership, burnout… Themes do tend to take on a life of their own. With a bit of creativity, we could have had a theme song. “It’s a sad thing to be a Granger… it’s a sad thing, you know.”

After admitting our self-indulgence in feeling sorry for ourselves, we had a good laugh. We did manage to start a different party. In the course of doing so, I was reminded of the Overseer’s instruction to the candidates during the Fourth Degree. Here we were talking about the Grange’s condition with an entirely negative focus. Who wants to come to our Pity Party?

Unfortunately, more than we might expect. Even the media seems to enjoy reporting on the “dying Grange.” My friend and I actually ended up having a laughing spell as we considered advertising the party. “You are invited to join us via Zoom and in person for a Pity Party. The theme will be ‘Let’s enjoy being miserable over everything wrong and discouraging about the Grange. Refreshments will be served.’”

It is, of course, irresponsible to deny the issues we face as an organization. (Although, we do often ignore the elephant standing in the corner!) But here we have another example of the value of the teachings of our order. Let me edit the Overseer’s instructions so they are not just about kids.

“If we desire to encourage people to love the Grange, we must make its labors cheerful. What people see makes the most lasting impression. We may tell them of the pleasures, but if their involvement shows it to be tedious, irksome, laborious, without any recreation of body or mind, they will soon lose all interest in it and seek enjoyment elsewhere.”

I recommend the complete version of the Overseer’s instruction to you. It includes phrases like “induce all to love” and “speaking the truth in love.” In short, making this a place that’s cheerful and a place where people want to be.

Occasionally, when old-timers speak of the past, they talk of things like dances at the Grange or huge suppers that included bean-hole beans or oyster chowder. On the back wall of the stage at Valley Grange, there are all sorts of interesting graffiti written by actors during plays and skits. Unfortunately, there’s not much distance between a nostalgia festival and a pity party. All it takes is for a few participants to start regretting and feeling sorry that “we don’t do things like that anymore.” Maybe somebody needs to ask, “Why not?”

Any degree or ritual quotations are from the forty-sixth edition of the 2013 Subordinate Grange Manual or the most recent edition of the Pomona Grange Manual. The views and opinions expressed in “Exploring Traditions” are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official doctrine and policy of the Grange. Information about the book “Exploring Traditions—Celebrating the Grange Way of Life” can be found at http://abbotvillagepress.com, on Mr. Boomsma’s Amazon Author Page, or by contacting the author.